There are times we put up a wall around us because of past experiences. This suit of armor is useful at first, but eventually becomes unhealthy when it evolves into a permanent part of our foundation. You know, when we begin doubting relationships and limiting our trust in others on a full-time basis.
Let me tell you, this wall of skepticism, disbelief, doubt, and protection is tiresome to maintain. It is so much easier to relinquish control, begin trusting, and open your heart. I know, it is possible that you will feel pain again but that is part of life and is by no means indefinite. How exciting is life if you always have your guard up and never actually experience joy, happiness and passion?
People are put in our lives on time and on purpose. If we feel hurt by another, it is an opportunity to learn and grow. This pain is not a reason to put up a wall that no one else can ever enter. Let those like-minded, supportive, and loving people in your life. Can you imagine what a relief it is to break down the wall one brick at a time and no longer spend unnecessary energy blocking people out of your life, being isolated and holding resentment?
Tear down the wall you have so strategically built over the past years or even decades:
Start thinking of you and not so much how you will isolate yourself from the potential harm doers. Begin thinking of what makes you happy and do those things, right now. Did you hear me? Take 15 minutes without distractions and focus on you and your happiness.
How you respond to others is on you. How others act is on them and if they are downright nasty, there is probably something in their life contributing to their behaviors. We can’t know what’s going on in everyone’s head and it’s not worth the effort to over analyze situations nor respond by building a wall around your heart.
You have never done something you aren’t proud of with the intention of making a so-called “mistake.” Learn, grow, forgive yourself, and move on. If you still have the wall up, you may think it is because of someone else. I bet you much of it is due to guilt that still lingers within you. You have nothing to feel guilty of and many times we feel guilty, this feeling is just the emotional response to an action. Rewrite the story. Yep it happened. Yep you learned. Yep you forgive yourself.
Have you reflected lately? If not, now is the time. Face your shadows. I promise you, if you don’t face your demons, they will continuously haunt you. And guess what?! By facing your thoughts and analyzing them, you will be able to set yourself free. Imagine that! Freedom to begin living and feeling emotions. Yes, there will be pains and gains but what is life without a life-long lesson to allow you to be the best version of you?
This process of chiseling down the wall is not going to be an overnight process. Take baby steps, be comfortable with your progress, and most importantly be gentle with yourself.
I hope this has helped you know how amazing you are and how you are worth all the love in the world especially of yourself.
P.S. Check out the Thrive Society, an amazing group where you are loved, supported, and inspired.
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