I’ve learned that if I’m having a bad day, yes even I, bubbly and happy Jen, has bad days where I feel that it’s ok to take my feelings out on others. IT IS NOT OK TO HURT ANOTHER. Just because I say this in all caps does not mean I have never done it. It’s such an important life lesson for me, that I’d like to emphasize it.
We are all humans. We all have stories. None of us chooses to be in the path of another’s anger. Unfortunately, it happens. We are waiting in a long line and we blame the family of 17 in front of us or the employee working the line. We are in a hurry to work and we blame the slow drivers in the left lane. We do poorly at work, and we blame our coworkers and our boss. Do you notice a theme here? Blame, blame, and more blame.
I could give so many more and more serious examples but how about you insert yourself in here? Think of a time where you deflected your anger on another. Did you feel bad about it later? Hopefully so, but...
I am spunky, witty, intelligent, and outgoing. I am overweight, have drank too much on several occasions, care way too much what others think, and often judge. I have come to the realization that for all of the negative things I can find about myself, there are not only many more positive instances but I can in fact turn the negatives into positives.
First, let’s start with being overweight. Without being overweight, I would have never had the opportunity to love me for me, curves and all. Without being overweight, I would have never known the support system out there. Without being overweight, I would have never started this journey to better health.
Without drinking too much, I would have never had my first panic attack which led me to a Jen version of enlightenment. Without drinking too much, I would have never realized how much my husband truly loves and supports me. Without drinking too much, I would have never realized how I could be a better me.
Without caring so much...
It is common practice to support our own countries, our own races, our own beliefs...really, our own everything.
What if for one day, we didn’t have walls, real or invisible, between states, countries, and continents? Between races? Between beliefs?
What if for one day, we realized that together, we are one?
One group of humans working towards a common goal of using each of our unique gifts to come together as one to live our purpose.
Why can’t we support all people, not just the ones that grew up in a similar geographic location as us?
Why can’t we support all people, not just the ones who have the same skin color as us?
Why can’t we support all people, not just the ones who have the same beliefs as us?
Christina Aguilera says it beautifully in her song, Change…”we’re all the same when everybody’s breathing.”
Underneath where we are from, our exterior, and our beliefs, we are all...
How can I be grateful when I want so much more?
This is a question that has crossed many minds, including my own. What I have come to realize is that consistent gratitude for today cultivates increased abundance and happiness for tomorrow. I want to stress that I don’t promote waiting for the future to be happy. You will be waiting for eternity if this is your approach to living. Live now. Be now.
I just know that since I have intentionally practiced being grateful several years ago, I’ve noticed I have even more to be grateful for than I did a month ago, a week ago, or even a day ago. You see, it’s not that I actually have more; it’s that I have found more to be grateful for. On the other hand, I also have more.
This is not a play on words or meant to confuse you. It is simple as this. Once I began being grateful, I realized there is much more to be grateful for than I imagined or was aware of. Once I began being grateful, I naturally began having...
How often do you merely go through the motions of life - eating, working, sleeping, repeat? Have you ever thought about this before? I didn’t either until about five years ago. Yep, I lived three decades of my life as a robot.
I worked my way up the corporate ladder to becoming a CFO before the age of 40. I had my doctoral degree in accounting. I was happily married with two Cocker Spaniels.
Everything was perfect until…I was having anxiety, panic, and symptoms of stress. How can this be? I was well-liked, successful, and was living exactly as society had planned for me. Did you catch that? I was so busy living in accordance with societal standards; I forgot to live in alignment with Jen’s standards. Crazy, right?! Not so crazy. So many women I talk to push through and believe stress is normal. Yes, a little stress here and there is reasonable, but continuous stress is not ok.
Fast forward to when I finally woke up. I say finally in the sense that it took...
I fell off the wagon…yep again. It doesn’t matter what wagon, the drinking wagon, the exercising wagon, the eating healthy wagon. It doesn’t matter. For me, falling off this wagon was and is not a failure. It’s the message I needed to remind me how beautiful life is, that I am human, that this kick in the pants was what I needed to remember. To remember how I am supported and loved, how life has so much to offer, and how I want to treat myself, as the goddess that I am.
I am not going to think of the future wagons and the potential of falling off again. I am going to stay in the now. I am going to go through that uncomfortable phase of guilt and feeling ill, then the wonderful phase of my eyes opening to what is possible, and then the here and now. How I can use this misstep or purposeful step, to be present, to be me, to use my gifts, to enjoy life, and to live according to me.
What and where is this wagon anyway? The wagon represents perfection and we all...
I am writing this as I’m overcoming a stomach bug my husband and I blame on shrimp. I woke up feeling extra tired. I forced myself to grab some coffee and run 2 miles. Bathroom break (yes, the number your thinking). Still tired. Went to breakfast. More coffee. Still tired and kind of nervous about how I was feeling. I am always a morning person. What if something is seriously wrong with me? Back home and out to walk the dogs for their Saturday walk. Bathroom break before and after the walk with the dogs (same number as the first). I gave in and slept for 2 hours. Out for furniture shopping and lunch. I felt better but still tired. Back to sleep for 4 more hours! What?!!
This is the part where you should remember it’s ok to feel shitty, mentally and/or physically. In this example, I was feeling shitty with the nerves, upset stomach and fatigue. And it’s ok. Although it may have been unpleasant, my body needed to rest, and I needed to listen.
I used to be one of...
For the longest time I have been hiding my spirituality, thinking people will look at me like I have seven heads. I am fortunate as a former CFO, Doctor in Accounting, and CPA to have a highly logical and structured part of me. Alternatively, as a Certified Professional Coach, I am blessed to have an extremely empathetic and intuitive side. I have found that this balance of logic and intuition is rare for someone like me, you know, a self-proclaimed, heart-centered nerd. I am intelligent when it comes to numbers, can read others very quickly, and often absorb others’ energy.
I have found that I have brought the side of me that fits the occasion, but never both. I have decided once and for all that I will begin bringing all of me to everything I do. I will no longer bring logical Jen to corporate functions and empathetic Jen to coaching and spiritual events. And whew! This is such a relief. You see, I wasn’t being as authentic as possible, even though authenticity is one...
Stop complaining and take action!
Have I gotten your attention? Good.
I have been surrounded by people who want more out of their life but don’t do anything about it. I’m frustrated and angry. I know my life long curriculum is playing a huge role in reducing my judgment of others, but I am here in this place of frustration and it’s perfect. Enough about me. On to you.
I see you, I see your potential and know if you only took a little teeny step, you would see what I see. You would get excited about the future and know that thriving in life is attainable.
Yes, it’s perfectly fine to complain for a little while. But, when it becomes for prolonged periods of time, you know, years for some, it’s time to reflect. See how much this way of thinking and behaving is really serving you.
It’s also okay to not be ready to make a change. However, if you’re not ready to make a change then don’t complain and be content in your current...
So often I’ve seen clients and loved ones either:
Do you see the pattern here? Let’s break this pattern right here and right now. Breaking a pattern requires just one step outside of the norm.
How long are you going to let life pass you by?
First, wake the ________ up! It is time we opened our eyes to all life has to offer. All of us are worthy of happiness and abundance but we must first be awake and willing to receive. I don’t mean being awake like a guru on a mountain, well that’s great too, but simply being awake and aware of our surroundings, our gifts, the amazing possibilities, and then moving forward with that hope, wonder, and search for whatever you want in life.
I have seen people stuck in life and have no clue that the box they have been putting themselves in daily is an...
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